Why I dislike afterschool playdates...

You'd think that since I have so many kids, adding one more friend to the bunch wouldn't matter.

You're wrong.

My kids are used to me, I'm used to them. They know my rules, my pet peeves, what they can and can't do. Add new kids into the mix, and they ask questions, they whine and they smell. No wait, I think smell must be a different post.

Why I dislike afterschool playdates...

1. They invade family time. Now that the kids are in school all day - separate from each other - when they come home, it's their chance to be together. Whether they choose to or not, at least the option was there. When other kids get involved, a sibling gets left out... much sadness (or arguing) follows. And Amanda always wants to play with them.

2. Boys vs Girls. 1 boy vs 5 girls. We share rooms. I don't like to hear "no boys/girls allowed". I don't like big kids leaving out little kids. These are values I have, so when playdates move outside that box, I get aggravated real quick. Real Quick.

3. Our flow/schedule gets all messed up. We have things to do when they get home: snack, homework, chores, playtime, dinner prep, setting the table, dinner, kitchen clean-up, maybe a little more free time, get ready for bed, reading. That sounds doable, but it takes ALL our time. If someone gets playdate time, their backpack and snack wrappers get left wherever they land and all their jobs get backed up. When they get home, it's hard to get caught back up.

3. The questions! These kids don't know me well enough and they ask questions (or ask my kids to ask me things that my kids already know the answer to, but thought they should check in case I've changed my stance on the ice cream truck, candy, video games, playing in the street, feeding mentos to small rodents .) Do you get the picture?

4. The wii get's it's own number, because we only have one. And there are always at least 2 people who want to play. So if you are going to have a turn, a five minute turn just isn't long enough. Sometimes the friend is video game savvy and it's ok, but usually the kid doesn't have a wii or some particular game so they haven't practiced as much as Jacob - so there tends to be some whining. "Jacob, don't do that. Jacob, stop killing me. Jacob, let me get one. Jacob, I wasn't ready. Jacob... whine, whine, whine." Not to mention, all the sisters sit around watching him play and now they want their turn. How much screen time do they really need?... and now it's unfair because so and so has a friend over.

5. "Something special "- all the children not involved in this particular playdate grow large doe eyes and tilt their head while pleading their case for "something special" (which means candy and a movie). Now I have to make a decision... and the consequences and repercussions that follow.

Know you know. And knowing is half the battle.